Random Blog: How do you know? #TeamTLF

How do you know its right?

How do you know this is your soul mate?

How do you know this is what really turns you on?

How do you know you can trust yourself to know if its true or not?


After years of being in this fantasy world, where nothing is what it seems, fantasies of any kind can be fulfilled at any moment; this world that is so far removed from the actual world we live in. When I’m in this world its like I walked into a chapter from The Chronicles of Narnia. When I step out of this mystical world for a fresh of breath air, I actually feel like I’m choking. Like a fish out of water. After 5 years I have changed. In a way that is now opposite of what I was when I entered this world. I used to feel out of place like I didn’t belong, I didn’t understand anything or anyone. I felt like the freak at the freak-show. Now its normal. When I’m not in this smutty world I feel like an outsider, I’m not a normal person anymore. I’ve evolved into something greater than “normal” and that my friend is beautiful.

This urge to write a blog came from some completely different idea, but once I start writing I kind of let my fingers take over and allow my brain to release whatever its been holding back, so enjoy.

Seriously though. In this day and age, how do we know what to believe is real vs. what is what we wish to be real?

I’ll tell you.

Sit down, alone.

Put on some music or be in a completely silent room.


Listen to your breathing, your heart beat, get your heart in tune with your body and mind.

Ask yourself the question you desire, and deep down you hold the answer.

Sometimes it takes shutting off the whole world and any influence and really listening to yourself.

  **When you don’t like something and someone offers it to you, right away you say no. If you are not sure if you want any at the moment you hesitate to think if you want it now. When you need an answer try what I mentioned above and you’ll be surprised how quickly you will know the truth.**


I think between the current events in my life and the things my loved ones have told me about life and my future… well I guess I just go to thinking and I had the urge to write… it may not even make sense but I kind of promised myself I’d start writing more again.

If you’d like to respond you may but no pressure😉

Have a beautiful day, do something to pay it forward today! :))



We’re going to Vegas #TeamTLF! #BlogMonday

Hey Hey Everyone!

I will be at the Avn Expo at the hard rock hotel in VEGAS!!!

Come see me:

17th: 12-2pm @ MunkeyBarz AND 3-7PM @ LA Direct Models

18th: 11am-2pm @MunkeyBarz AND 3-7PM @ LA Direct Models

19th: All Day

I’m super excited to sign with LA Direct Models and MunkeyBarz for the first time at this convention. It is going to be a great time!

See u there #TeamTLF!!



bit.ly/TLFMBZ             @MunkeyBarz1

LADIRECTMODELS.COM                 @DirectModels

Yea boi! #FreeAgent Status!

Hey there Lovers and Friends!

As some of you have heard I am now a Free Agent in the porn world! This is good and bad, but right now it is a good thing! Let me explain…

The main reason girls like to have an agent is laziness. They just don’t want to deal with the business side of porn. I don’t blame em, but I am not them!

The bad part about being a Free Agent falls to the old saying, “Out of sight, out of mind.”

So it is easy to think, “Well what are you doing TLF!? Get yourself a new agent!”  NOT SO FAST!

I think my fans (#TeamTLF) can help me more than an agent can. Seriously! Have you seen my twitter fans lately? They/You are AHHHHMAZING! Thank you for RTing my wishlist and requesting me @ you favorite companies!


Now for the positive side of being on #FreeAgent Status:

– I am responsible enough to handle my own bookings.

– I know how to be professional

– I am in control of my career and what type of shoots I do.

– I collect my own money and don’t have to wait on my agent to “have time” to give me MY money!  LOL

– Don’t have to pay an agent a % of my earnings after I did ALL of the work.

– Don’t have to worry about an agent & their “politics”  prohibiting me from being booked.

– I will be able to make Stress Free SMUT NOW! YAY!!!!


Listen, there are pros and cons to everything and every situation. However, I have been performing for 3 years now. Until I find someone who actually knows what to do with a smart, professional, beautiful model like myself… I am going to enjoy this to the fullest!


So hope this little update helped… I just want to say THANK YOU! one more time to #TeamTLF… You are the reason I keep going!





p.s. I will  be doing a live twitter interview at 1pm PST tomorrow!

Hi! My name is Tara.

“Maybe through an analysis of whom we have said we are not through the years we can figure out who we really are?” –Allison Vivas’

So after reading this blog it inspired me to write a little… (http://www.xbiz.com/blogs/136722)

I have spent the last, I don’t recall how many years, spending my days trying to figure out who I am. What I realized, from the time away from LA LA Land, really is just a big fat juicy reality check. Not that it’s a bad thing… just kind of shitty how it had to happen. Luckily, I have a great professional and personal team that I decided to let into my circle.

I have gone through some crazy shit in my life… I recently felt like my life was too much to handle, like I was ashamed of who I am because of what I do for a living. Then I try to justify it by telling myself what I do for a living is not who I am.

John Stagliano said it best in his speech at the AVN 2011 Award Show. I’m not going to quote it,  but he basically said WE should be proud of who we are. If we are going to be in this industry then be in it and be proud! Enjoy our time.   See I told you I shouldn’t quote it.. tried to find it online but no luck.

That’s besides the point.. I am trying to say that I agree. I didn’t get into porn to become famous or become a porn star or any of that. I got in to go to college! Who knew I’d enjoy it so much. LOL!!! I did one video and my family found out…. but the reality of doing porn really hit this year! Crazy!!!

I thought I was going to fold. I really thought that because I have done adult films, I can’t do anything else for the rest of my life. Yeah some ignorant family members and old classmates dont want to talk to me anymore… OH WELL! Let them be idiots and live a boring life. Really, what good will it do to worry about the people that dont want to be in my life.. just like my sperm donor, they came into my life served their purpose and kept it moving.

The beautiful thing about life is that you can fuck up a million times, but if you don’t quit you can always get back up, dust your shoulders off, then keep it moving. lol

I drive through the streets of my hometown and I see so many people cracked out, homeless, broke. Businesses gone! Like what the hell happened. Some of my closest friends have such closed minds. I got into a texting war trying to explain myself, until suddenly I stopped. Thirty minutes after trying to prove who I wasn’t, I got a glimpse of who I really was.

Like I said… after having time away from the hustle and bustle it allowed me to reflect… It is important to know who you are, what you stand for, and where you want to go.


My Name is Tara. I’m that girl that talks too much, has bad timing on jokes, but still gets your cock hard.

Yes! I am a naughty girl..”

Life is too short to not be true to yourself.

There is so much BS in this world to distract us…. not anymore.😀

Tomorrow is a new day. I am eager to start this new journey. I hope you stick around to see where it goes.



p.s. I have a live tag team match on Friday.. you can watch it or buy it later.. either way support me & go to:

Click to see Live Show!


Remember when you were a little kid, you had so many dreams and hopes? The world was such a big place and you wanted to see all of it!

When I was a little girl I would write lists… I was bored a lot. Some days I would write down a list of “100 things I wanted to do before I die,” or “top 50 places I’d love to travel to.” I also did things like plan my dream wedding, with my dream man, in my dream life. I’m serious! Me and my BFF would do this together all the time LOL! Anyways, I’m pretty sure by the time I was 12 I knew I wanted to save the world. I didn’t know if it would be by way of LAW or MEDICINE but either one was fine by me, and society.

Somewhere along the way of my teenage years, I lost that innocence we all posses as young-lings. I don’t remember how or why, I just did. I began to realize that “money makes the world go round” and there are politics in places you wouldn’t imagine. I guess my senior year economics class opened my eyes.

A month before my graduation I was looking into how to get money for college. I already had two jobs at this point. I know how hard it is to work 40+ hours a week and go to school full time. I bought my first car by saving up paychecks for months. So why not find another job for college? Well my mind took me to the “Dark side” immediately. “Fast Easy Money,” Right? Wrong.

Two and a half years and 250+ scenes later this is the product of “Fast Easy Money.”

Look. I am not complaining. I had a great time… It was fun and very important part of my life. I am just not sure what to do now, where to go or even really what to say publicly or keep to myself. Luckily, I have a great support team behind me right now and I am very thankful. I guess I didn’t realize PORN could actually be something I enjoy to do for a living, OR even be the door that opened that Heroine heart I possesed as a young girl. Could porn really be the first step that I took to add my contribution to this world? WOW! That’s something to think about.


Well Cookie and I are going to go take a long walk.. I hope you all enjoy your day and thank you for reading. If you read this, it means you care. For that I thank you.



Everything Must Come to an End…

For those of you that have been following my career since at least the beginning of the year, know that I launched my xxx website in January with Blazing Bucks.

There were some great times with fans and fellow girls on the network. I appreciate all that came from this experience. However, upon a mutual agreement, as of June 1, 2011 I will no longer host my site with Blazing Bucks.

I would like to thank everyone that helped make this possible. I would like to give a big thank you to the fans that singed up! I will have another site in the future. So stay tuned. I want to launch when I feel like the site is the way I truly want it. Until then feel free to subscribe to my blog, send me tweets and messages about what you would like to see… what will you actually pay to $ee😉


Hope this helps for those that have been asking…